13 May 2013 No Comments

Out with The Old in with The New

My ‘friend’… I don’t mind seeing you go since it seems you are in denial of my happiness, my life, my partner (and his children) and everything that defines me. When I sense envy instead and reluctance to nurture the relationship, than I guess you were right to be so quick to ‘unfriend’ and ‘block’ me on Facebook, for pointing this out to you. I guess the truth hits hard a times… :roll:

You barely respond to my emails not to mention react on the things that -you know- are important to me. You refuse to reply to my comments left for you on FB and instead turn this into a one-way street where all you do is absorb the attention you get from others. Life is not just about you. Perhaps that is a tough thing for you to grasp but it ain’t. Wake up call!

It’s sad that it has to be like this after such a long time, but I guess I haven’t been happy with the friendship nor with you and your reactions for a while now, but each time you’ve managed to brush it off. If you don’t want to be an active part of the communication process, it’s time for me to leave the relationship behind and gladly move on.

Yes I feel sorry for you that a certain issue in your life is happening and that you are scared of what the future will bring for you and your children. But it doesn’t mean that the world revolves around you and you only. Every person on this planet has got his or her own problems. You either deal with it or you don’t but don’t expect the ostrich attitude from me.

If you want others to be there for you when you need them, it might be wise to at least show some interest and care in case the day will come where you need them. I guess the fact that you immediately ‘unfriended’ and blocked me -after I told you my truth and how I felt about the situation-, says it all really. It was the kind of confirmation I was expecting.

It made me chuckle… As did your question about where my blog had gone? (..) It has been here since about ‘forever’… If you would’ve been interested in my life thus this blog, you would’ve known. So yes, that question seriously raised my eyebrow. I no longer feel comfortable being myself or sharing parts of my life with you, so it’s time to move on.

I have revalued my expectations and this friendship and I’m thru, I’m not your doormat whenever it suits you nor will I be your Facebook self-esteem booster whilst you play your well performed attention-seeker role. I’m actually quite happy with the way you left things; fact is that my personal growth has completely outgrown you and this friendship.

Thanks for making that perfectly clear, I can let go of something I’ve tried to hold on to for way way too long! It now can be replaced by something bigger and more beautiful :)

I do not open up the truth to one who is not eager to get knowledge, nor help out any one who is not anxious to explain himself. When I have presented one corner of a subject to any one, and he cannot from it learn the other three, I do not repeat my lesson.

Written by Zesty Gal in category: Uncategorized

18 Dec 2012 No Comments

Delay

It’s one of those days where you get up and know everything will go wrong… I’m on the train and it already has a 15 minutes delay due to the fact that another broke down in the north of this speck on the globe. In that area there’s only two tracks, one for each train, each way. So when a train breaks down they all pile up like one happy family. Since they run every 15 minutes you probably can do the math yourself.

I’m on the train and I know for sure that I’ll be late eventhough I was actually running late already. This was the train that I was supposed to take anyway… I will be late but I can’t really be bothered. At times you have to let go of the timetables in your head because if you don’t, stuff is going to pile up just like those trains. So I decided to let go and trust that things will work out eventually. It will all fall in place…

That’s not what I was thinking tho this morning when I accidentally smudged and stained eyeliner all over my mouth and chin and my first thought was ‘wtf…’ That’s not what I was thinking when Mr. Geek ignored me half of the time this morning. I left him to be in his own world since he was probably not awake yet. But it wasn’t the kind of morning I was expecting when I woke up, still tired and wanting to sleep forever.

I’m on the bus now and even the bus is running late but like I said earlier I can’t be bothered. It’s pissing down with rain today -the sky is totally grey- so it’s gonna rain all day long, but I can’t be bothered. Honestly… It’s like I’ve given up, coz I know I can’t do a thing about it. I have no control over any of this so why would I try to go against it? I would only start to frustrate myself in doing so. So I don’t.

I’m sure things will turn out alright eventually, I’m sure there is a bigger plan today that is going to make things right, the moment I’ll trust it to do what it’s supposed to do. So I’m going to finish writing and have a look around me instead. Grey skies, watery images and the smell of wet raincoats on a lovely dreary day ;) I’d better stop writing or else I might become bus sick and puke allover myself… *hehe*

Have a beautiful day!

Written by Zesty Gal in category: Amsterdam II, Journey, Repatriation, Work
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